Deprogramming for Dummies
by DriannaHarper
Summary: The boys try to make things right. Somehow, the brainwashed assassin is better at apologies. And Darcy knows her boys better than they think. (This makes more sense if the last scene in 'Interludes' is read, but should be okay without it.) (Part 9 of the Couch Series)


They aren't brooding. That's the one thing they both agree on. Captain America doesn't brood, and the Winter Soldier has nothing to brood about.

Except for one very missing former Science! intern that hasn't been in the Tower in over a week.

Darcy had left messages for them both on their return from the most recent op. She and Pepper had an Avengers/SI meeting in Tokyo, and would be gone for at least two weeks, possibly up to a month. They'd taken Clint and Tony along with them, and Sam had a conference in DC he was presenting at, so the boys had been left alone for the first time in a long while.

This coming close on the heels of finding out that Darcy was still keeping her distance from them was driving them to… not brood. Because they didn't brood.

At first, they kept to the suite. Then, they started hanging around the labs. An hour, and a heavily breathing, green tinged Bruce had them retreating to the communal training gym.

Natasha kicking both of their asses while muttering to herself in Cantonese sent them to the roof.

Thor taking one look at them, and the loud thunder booming on the sun shiny day convinced them to call it a quits, and they all but ran back to their living room.

Barnes is damned near in tears, and Cap's pacing. "Why is she still mad at us, Buck? We've been trying to fix what we did…"

"Bull shit, punk," he snarls at his best friend. "I've been trying to fix things, you've been acting like everything should be just fine cause you're back now. You shouldn't have left in the first place!"

"So now this is all MY fault?"

Bucky sighs. "No, my stupid shit is on me. Me running when I couldn't handle it? That's on me. But you bailed on her, man, and you haven't done a damned thing to make up for it. I've tried, God knows I haven't done near enough, but at least I'm putting in the effort. Aside from asking her to move in here with us, have you done a SINGLE thing to make it up to her? To prove you won't just ditch her again?"

When Steve stays silent, Bucky shakes his head.

"She doesn't trust us, Stevie. And I can't blame her. She and I are working on things, but she knows I can get overwhelmed and run again. You were supposed to be the strong one, the one she could count on. And you weren't. When she needed you, you weren't there. We gotta find a way to prove we will be."

"What if we can't?" Steve asks in a quiet voice.

"I'm going to find a way, Rogers. I just hope you can too. Cause being without her is like being without breathing, and I've been there. And I never want to do it again. I'll keep trying until she leaves me for good, and even then I'll keep hoping. You? Get your head out of your ass, admit you fucked up, and fix it."

Bucky shuts himself in his bedroom at that, and throws himself on his bed. He hears Steve pacing for a while, and then a book hits one of the living room walls. After an hour or so, Steve shuts himself in his own room.

"Hey, Jarvis?" Barnes asks.

"… Sir?"

"I know you're pissed at me, buddy, and I don't blame you. But I need to know how Darce's doing. What time is it, where she is?"

"Local time is 8:49 pm."

"Is she still awake?"

"…She is."

"Would she mind if I Skyped?"

"She has asked 'Are you planning on bitching about Bruce or Thor, cause seriously, not my fault'?"

He smirks. "I'm not complaining, but they might come up. Thing is, my StarkPad is in her suite. Would she mind if I went there to talk to her?"

There is a pause, and Jarvis responds with, "She wonders why you're asking, as you have a key card to her suite."

He doesn't answer Jarvis, just moves through the suite he and Steve share to the more comfortable one opposite. He goes straight to the bedroom, picks up his StarkPad, and dials Darcy.

"Well, hey there, stranger. Been a while. Did you carve my name into any HYDRA bases?"

His face lights up seeing her, and her eyes are drinking him in, so he can't call it a loss. "I put a heart around our initials and everything. Barton'll have to do the arrow, though. Gotta give him something to call his own."

"He is SO bad when on detail. He's already been arrested three times. And it's only been two weeks. Like, there isn't even math to do the calculations for that. Tony's tried!"

Barnes frowns. "He's supposed to be looking out for you, why is he getting arrested?"

"Don't ask, it just makes us giggle when we talk about it. I'll tell you after I get home. So, how are things there? Besides Bruce, Thor, Nat, and Jane treating you like you're going to be smashed?"

"It's nothing we don't deserve, darlin. I just miss you. We've had a week down, and I didn't realize how quiet it was without you here."

"Now you shut up and listen to me, James Barnes. Just because you've messed up a few times does not mean you deserve to get Smashed by any of my over protective peeps. You stop that right now."

"I kind of can't, honey," he murmurs, almost too quiet for her to hear. "I've been trying to make things right, but you got more than enough reason to doubt me. This programming in my head… it's going to make me do some stupid shit. And it might make me run again. And I can't blame you, or them, for not trusting me."

Darcy brings her right hand up, pushes her glasses to her forehead, and squeezes the top of her nose with a deep sigh and closed eyes.  
"You couldn't have done the 'really deep talking' thing when I was in range to bop you with a pillow and give you a hug?"

"Apparently not."

"James-"

"I get it, I do. I just thought we were making progress."

"We ARE-"

"Then why didn't I know you had a floor until two weeks ago?"

Her hand moves from her nose to her temple. "You never asked?"

"Darcy-," she waves a hand.

"Gimme a sec, I'll-"

"No, baby. I don't want you thinking up excuses, or thinking you need to. You deserve your own space. You do, and we've-I've- disappointed you so many times, I'm glad you have a place, and people, if things go toes up. I've just… I've worried, since last time, since you went face to face with the Soldier, that you wouldn't have anywhere. I think he knew Steve would try to chase him."

"Oh My God, Barnes, shut the hell up for a minute. I swear, you can out talk Tony, and even *I* can't do that."

She sighs, rubs her forehead a couple more times. "Is this all because you didn't know I had my own floor?"

"No. That was the last on the list of 'we've been stupid'. I still say Steve is the dumbest of them all."

"Steve's a smart guy."

"Not when it comes to dames. And not when it comes to 'making up for the fact that I ran on you when you needed me'. Neither of us is good on that one."

"You're trying, James."

"You're still keeping me away, Darce."

They're both silent, staring at each other from half a world away.

"It's the first time, isn't it?" she asks.

"The first-"

"The first time you've been left behind, had to wait for someone to come home to you."

"Yeah. It is."

"Imagine four months of that. And that's what I went through. Except I never knew if you were okay."

"Do you… do you want me to not call? Until you get back? It'd be fair."

The eyeroll that ensues is epic. "Hi, have we met? My name is Darcy, and I THOUGHT I was talking to my boyfriend."

"But-"

"My point, dork, was that it's HARD being on that side. Not knowing if your people are okay. But I MISS you, and I'd love to hear from you every moment of every damned day I'm here. I know when you guys are out, you can't check in as much as I can-"

"I can. I will," he promises. "I'm just… not used to having someone to check in with. But I will, I promise. Every day."

"Every day," makes her smile. "Speaking of, I don't even know what time it is here, jet lag is wicked lame, but my eyeballs are saying it's sleepytime. And I have a press conference with Pepper in the morning."

"One day you're going to explain how Miss Potts lets you call her Pepper."

"One day, you'll let me paint your nails."

"Not going to happen."

"Ditto."

"Darcy? I love you, baby. Be safe. Come home to me."

"I love you too, Barnes. Keep Cap out of trouble till I get there to do it for you."

They Skype, call, and text almost constantly for the next five days. Then Darcy goes radio silent.

Jarvis won't report in, and all the other Avengers are scattered on other missions. He doesn't know what to do, so he ends up standing on the end of the Helipad.

Close to sunset, a quinjet appears, with a woman beckoning him aboard. "You're Barnes, right? We're headed west, man, hurry the hell up."

He's jumped aboard before the Soldier has a say. "Who the hell are you?"

"I'm Hill. Clint's driving. We're here to get you to your buddy. Cap took a hell of a hit."

"Is he okay?"

"Should be. Banner says the serum should be enough to keep him going. Stark has gone to get Falcon."

"Where's Darcy?"

Hill hesitates. "She took a hit, too. She's going to be okay, but she was out for a couple of days. Minor concussion, some bruising and lacerations. Cap took most of the damage."

"She was out for DAYS, and no one told me?"

Maria and Clint exchange looks. "Jarvis is her medical proxy. He didn't think she'd want you to know."

"Why in the hell not?"

Hill sighed. "She was awake for a while, and she kept insisting you and Steve not know she was hurt. That you make sure Steve is okay before anything else. We were honoring her request."

He mutters under his breath for a while, but as soon as they land, he storms into Steve's room.

"You okay?" he demands.

"Uh, yeah, thanks for… asking?"

"Darcy's been hurt too, and she's too-"

"WHAT? Darcy shouldn't have even been… where is she?" Steve demands.

"Urm… Hill?" Bucky directs the question to Maria.

She points vaguely to her left, as Steve tries to untangle himself.

Bucky finally stops him. "Okay, jerk, no. I'm going to go check on her, you're going to stay here. Do you even know where here is?"

"Somewhere… in Asia?"

"Good guess, but not close enough. I'm going to go check on my girlfriend. I might not be back for a while. You are going to stay in that bed, and do what the nurses, and scary Miss Hill tell you to. I'll be back when I have more answers."

He makes his way to Darcy's room, hoping for the best. He's not disappointed. "Seriously? Not even Jell-O? Like, real Jell-O, not these freaking fakes, that are SO squid, don't even lie. It says on the label that it's squid. This hospital blows."

"Darce?"

"James? What are you doing here, man? And please tell me you brought me something that is not made out of ink to eat. I can lick a copier if that's what I want."

"What the hell?" he asks as he wraps her up in his arms. "You were in meetings. What happened? And how did you end up here? And why are you licking my shirt?"

"My mouth still tastes icky, man. And you always taste yummy. Seriously, those things taste like the dreams printers have when they're dying, don't try them. But still, why are you here?"

"You and Steve are in the hospital, baby. They said you both got hit. What happened?"

"Oh. Pepper and I were coming out of a meeting, and there was a thing? I'm not sure exactly what the thing was. It was way big and creepy, and I hit my Avengers alarm and got Pepper out of the way, but it must have smacked me. Next thing I know, Cap's in front of me with his shield, and he got batted around a few times. Then I got hit, and now I'm here!"

"You promised to keep safe, babydoll. You didn't."

"Hey, I can't help giant creepy thingies. You can't fight me on that one. Plus, Steve was there, and we gotta keep him safe. He has no sense. At all. In his skull."

"She isn't wrong," Sam drawls from her doorway. "He's still fighting the nurses, and we all know how that'll go. What are we doing here, kitten?"

Darcy scrunches her face up for a moment. "I think I want the less head achy option. I want to go home. My home. My real home. Can I go in the Jet?"

Sam nods. "Yep, Jet's ready for everyone, once they've cleared medical."

"Cool-io. Back to the Tower. Administer the dosage, Jarvis."

Within a minute, every Avenger in a room is ready to leave. There are nurses trailing after them, arguing.

"It isn't worth it. Really. They won't listen. We'll get them home, where we can keep them contained, and make sure the treatment takes. Especially YOU, Barton."

Everyone has noticed not only the splinted arm and the limp, but the vocal nurse that's following him and yelling loudly.

"How bad is he?" Pepper asks, in Americanized Japanese.

"Fool will not take medicine, or advice. Insists on being tough man."

Pepper looks at Darcy. "Wanna learn Japanese? We have another PA in the making?"

"Jarvis, can you translate?"

In two minutes, Barton has another woman mothering him, with Jarvis' influence, and everyone is in the jet.

"ETA to Avenger Tower, three hours, forty minutes."

Darcy gives up at once, puts her head in Bucky's lap and angles the rest of her to land semi-comfortably over Sam and Steve. She feels her hair brushed out of her face, and then a hand run through it, continually.

"Baby, when we get home… where do you want to go? You said in the hospital that you wanted to go home. I… can take you to the suite on your floor, if you want. Or your suite on our floor. Or the one on Thor's. And I don't have to stay. I'd like to, but-"

"Wanna go home," she snuffles into his pants. "Ask Pepper."

Three hours later, Steve finally starts to ask, "Pep-"

"No way, Captain. They are finally managing to figure their thing out, and we're still not okay with you. You just took a bullet for her. That gets counted. But you did both of them wrong. And you haven't done a thing to fix it. Believe me, Jarvis is counting."

Sam nods. "Sorry, man. I'm going to be as supportive as I can, being your guy and all, but you were a dick, and I had to be there to watch it."

"So you aren't going to help?"

"I didn't say that. I just said you're kind of a self-centered jerk sometimes. None of this was about you. I mean, the you and me thing was."

He shakes his head. "You bailed on Darcy when she needed you, dude. I was there, I saw it. Having Barnes leave hurt her enough, but you left WILLING. You have to let them have time to fix them. And you have to fix your own problem. You left, all on your own, and you haven't done shit to fix it. And I won't do it for you."

There's silence until they land at the Tower. Bucky picks up the soundly sleeping woman on his lap. After a long, silent conversation, Pepper leads Barnes into the elevator.

Sam trails after them, and waits until the rest are ready to take to their floors. They stop on 90 for Tony to get out on his and Pepper's floor, 89 for Clint and Natasha, 88 for Bruce, 87 for Thor and Jane, 86 is for Steve, Sam, Bucky and Darcy, but only Steve gets out on it. The communal kitchen is on 69, because, Tony.

Level 78 is their stop, and Sam follows Pepper, and Bucky carrying Darcy out of the lift. Pepper sighs. "Just so you are aware, she doesn't authorize use of her floor except in dire need. Last time, it required two fifths of tequila and a 12 pack of cheap beer. And we did Tony's nails in purple and blue, and Clint's in red and gold."

She swipes her card, and they all convene in Darcy's living room. Looking around for a long moment, Bucky comes to a decision.

"Pepper, thank you for being there for her, and letting us in. I have this from here out. You should check on Tony.

"Sam. Go take care of my idiot best friend. He has no idea what he's done, and you're about the only one that can teach him on this."  
Sam takes one last look around, and backs out of the door.

Once it's closed, Bucky carries Darcy to her room, and sits down with her on the foot of the bed.

"Darcy, baby? You would probably feel better sleeping if you washed off the hospital smell. Want to get in the shower?"

She humfs, and nuzzles into his shoulder.

"I hate to do this, darlin, but I'm going in that shower with ya. You can wake up a bit, and I can wash your hair, or you can be stubborn, and I'll do it anyway and you'll have tangles in the morning."

"Mmf. You suck, Barnes. You aren't my favorite anymore."

"I thought Rhodey was your favorite."

"That was like, forever ago. You, however, are on my hate list. You are making me stand up."

"You have been in bed with a head injury. Your head needs checking."

"Your head always needs… oh… you meant, THAT sort of checking. Yes, please, a little to the left," she almost purrs as he strokes his fingers around her scalp.

"Woman. Stop tempting me."

He has them both stripped, and meandering towards the shower at that point.

She starts to nuzzle at his chin as soon as he sets her on her feet, and he directs her into the oncoming spray of the shower. "Darce, sorry, but we gotta do this right."

She crosses her arms under her breasts. "You are SO beyond lame, Barnes."

Pulling her to his chest under the flow, he kisses her cheek. "Believe me, I'd rather be doing other things. But you might still be funny in the head at the moment."

He works a lather of her shampoo in, and sure enough, some of it is coming away red.

"You've been in and out for three days, so I have no idea how old that is. But I don't want to risk it. Want conditioner?"

"Are we at mine or yours? Cause Steve has BAD, overpriced stuff."

"We're… We're at yours. Your suite, on your floor."

"Awesome, then there's the stuff Pep got me. Put it on, give me a five minute count down, and let me know when to rinse it out. There's a lot I can do in five minutes."

She. Is not wrong. As Bucky finds out.

Once they're rinsed off and dry enough to climb into bed, he asks about the reason for hiding her floor. A floor that is much more HER than either the apartment had been, or her current suite on Steve's floor was.

"My floor was never a secret. You guys, just, didn't ask. Like, nothing changed after you left."

She starts to crawl over to the closest side of the bed, when he pulls her back.

"I'm trying-"

"James, I know-"

"Then stop cutting me off," he says, as he runs both hands through her hair. She relaxes back into the bed, slowly.

"I hurt you. I didn't mean to. And I'm going to do my best to make it up to you. But I won't always be able to. Sometimes I'll have to go away. And now I know, how horrible that is to live with. To not know if you're safe and okay.

"Darce, damn-" he breathes into her hair. "You are so much stronger than me or Stevie. We couldn't deal with it, waiting for word, making sure everyone was okay. We'd both be the ones charging in, making damn fools of ourselves and getting our asses kicked."

"..And?"

"And what?" Bucky asks, as he braids her hair and ties it at the end. "I can't promise anything else. I have to go away sometimes, especially if Steve's gotten himself tangled up in some dumb idiot adventure."

"And that's it. Sometimes you have to go away and be a hero? You broke up with me over that?"

"No, I didn't… Damn it, Darcy. I hurt people. I get hurt on missions."

"Hello, who is concussed here from fending off a giant slimy thing, who helped stare down a mean robot sent by a God, and who took out four Hydra agents with a stun gun? That'd be me, Agent 'only got smacked around a little bit'. Sometimes I get hurt on missions too."

"Darcy-"

"Out. Get out."

He startles enough that she can pull away. "I did your blame game bull shit on your turf, I'm not doing it in my home. Get out of my house with that crap, Barnes." She scoots to the very edge of the bed.

It doesn't take him half a minute to wrap himself around her back. "Honey, no. That's my point. I'm stuck on you like glue. I ain't a good person. But you seem to like me anyway. You just gotta know what you're getting into."

"I fucking know, Barnes. You think I haven't had years to figure this out?"

"I know you have, baby. So, I'm done with the 'blame game bull shit'. Can we, just, lay back and do the cuddle thing? I'm still worried about your head, and I really want to hold you. Been a long three weeks without my Darcy time."

It takes a bit of persuading, but they finally lie down and curl up together. He's overly cautious of her scalp, she's hoping to deflect more conversation with her headache. They're both almost asleep when she bolts upright, snags a pen off her bedside table, and throws it with deadly accuracy at the AC vent. There is a startled yelp, and slower than normal slithering.

"Serves you right, asshole!"

Barnes looks up at her in awe. "Don't ask. Just cuddle."


End file.
